Introduction
to Deal Writers’ Community Poem, Number 2.
August
2009
Dear Colleagues,
I’m sure that we have all heard of the poetic form, haiku, so I won’t insult anyone’s
intelligence by pretending to be an expert steeped from head to foot in the
history, major proponents and spiritual message of the form.
Instead I will just say that as the haiku form will be
the focus of Deal Writers’ second
Community Poem, I have put together a few notes on the form. Please feel
free to read them if you’d like to, and to investigate haikus for yourself if
you wish to do so.
In terms of Augusts’ Community Poem, there is no title, as that would be a) too
intrusive upon your contributions; and b) a little too forceful for the form
itself. But the idea of this poem is as follows.
For the sake of clarity, I would like us all to stick
to the three line form haiku, with the first line having 5 syllables, the
second 7, and the third 5. This puts us all on a level playing field and
will avoid any differences of opinion as to whether it is difficult to follow a
two syllable line or a one line haiku etc, etc.
At the end of the experience, what I envisage us creating
is a Haiku-Chain. By this I mean
that each writer will read the haiku/s that they receive and then respond to
either: a) the feel/ tone/ atmosphere of the haikus; or b) any theme they think
is present; or c) the actual words in the previous haiku/s.
Thus, as the poem progresses it should get easier to
respond to, as although each writer should predominantly pay attention to the verse
written by the immediately previous
writer, there will obviously be more lines to respond to as the writing
continues. The haiku - chain should hopefully, by this method, develop
organically and happily.
The process should be pretty self-explanatory, but for
those who haven’t done it before, please note:
Every person who has asked to join in this writing
experience will receive a list in
order of who will write first, second, third etc. I will write the first haiku
(in the form of a Word document) and
then email that haiku as an attachment
to the second person on the list. The second person will then open the Word
document, read my haiku, leave a three
line gap after my haiku, write their haiku, and send the whole document as
an attachment to the third person. The third person then reads the document, leaves
a three line gap after the last haiku, writes their haiku and emails the
attachment/all three parts onto the fourth person, and so on down the list.
NB: the use of the three line gap differentiates
between each writer, and allows each part of the haiku chain to breathe. I ask
that we don’t annotate our names
next to or near the haikus at this point as it would be too intrusive to the
flow and appearance of the piece.
NB: This process will obviously be reliant on whether
the list operates well/in order. To enable it do so, if anybody is going to be away for an extended
period without internet access, then please tell me and the person you would
receive the haiku from, so that we can juggle
the order it is sent in.
NB: Currently there are 9 members who have said that
they would like to take part, and so, with the 3 line gaps and 3 line haikus,
the total will be 57 lines if all of the 9 take part. As such, the poem will
continue over two pages. Quite impressive, I’m sure.
NB: If there is now anybody else who wishes to join in
this activity, please let me know and I will see what I can do about finding a
way to accommodate everybody.
When the last
person on the list has received the previous haikus and written their own haiku,
they should send the Word document as an attachment back to me, and I will let all concerned know that our second
community poem is complete. Although the finished piece will be an item on its
own, I will then annotate in someway - probably unobtrusively on the bottom of
the page, - so that we will all know who wrote haiku part 1, haiku part 2 etc.
After all this is done, I will send our Haiku-Chain to Jo and ask her very nicely to put it
on our website so all members can see it. In the meantime, good luck to one and
all and happy writing!
Gary Studley
Some Haiku Information (not exhaustive). Gary Studley
Haiku: In origin, a traditional form of Japanese
poetry, usually dealing with nature.
A haiku has three lines and
describes a single moment, feeling or thing.
Generally, in the contemporary
Western world, the first and third lines contain 5 syllables each, whilst the
second line contains 7 syllables.
Form: a minimalist form of
poetry. The writer has 17 or fewer syllables through which to convey an
experience…..Since the early 1900s, there has been a great increase in the
number of English language haiku poets… ..Because English is so different than
the Japanese language, and because so few people now live in 'pure nature' the
English form has evolved in its own way.
17 or Not?: English speaking/writing
poets have come to feel that a haiku length of less than 17 syllables, with
something like 6 or 7 beats overall, typically in three phrases with the middle
line a little longer than the other two (i.e. with extra syllables and possibly
an extra beat) sounds natural/ right/ light/ and enough for our purpose. To
insist on 17 syllables therefore, may result in the 'half-said thing' becoming
the 'too-much-said thing'. On the other hand, some haiku poets choose to
write 5-7-5 as a discipline and enjoy the challenge of trying to do so
spontaneously, whilst maintaining lightness.
From Then
to Now: While traditional Japanese haiku has focused on nature
and the place of humans in it, some modern haiku poets, both in Japan and the
West, consider a broader range of subject matter suitable, including urban
contexts. While pre-modern haiku avoided certain topics such as sex and overt
violence, contemporary haiku sometimes deal with such themes.
Content of
a haiku:
Typically, but not always, focused on what the writer witnesses in everyday
life that is more outstanding or important than normal, something deemed worth
reaching for in written expression. The something can pertain to any of the
five senses, seeing, hearing, tasting, feeling, smelling, for example, hearing
– a bird's song, or seeing – light glistening on water. Some traditionalists argue
that a haiku must contain an obvious reference to a season and must be nature
focused, but many of the English language haiku of the last half century do not
employ a nature focus. After all, for the most part we live in cities, not the
rural Japan of centuries ago.
Common
techniques of English poetry (alliteration, assonance, enjambment, rhythm, melody) have
a part to play in haikus, though none of these should attract too much
attention to itself. Even rhyme may occasionally be used without detriment to
taste, but it can appear to glare. These are matters each poet is entitled to
settle for him/herself, using personal taste in a pragmatic way.
Titles: are usually avoided -
they may compromise the open-endedness and brevity, narrowing the context
whilst lengthening the poem.
Brevity: one to three lines
totalling 17 syllables or less; the average length of published
English-language haiku is about 13 syllables. Some suggest that a better
measure of brevity is that when read aloud, a haiku can be completed in one
breath.
Two phrases in Juxtaposition: most (not all) haiku are
composed of two distinct phrases. The two phrases are seemingly about different
elements noticed by the writer, but the relationship between them is what
provides the poetic spark. NB: in
some haikus the cut, or changing point, between the two phrases, is marked by
the use of a comma or other form of punctuation, which usually does not majorly
jar when read. NB: Capital letters are rarely used to start lines/phrases.
Lack of poetic devices: in general (though not
globally so) an avoidance of traditional poetic forms such as rhyming, simile
and metaphor.
Purpose: communication and
awareness. Along with other forms of writing and poetry, haiku is a vehicle for
conveying feelings, sentiments, impressions, perceptions to other persons.
A form of meditation: By
starting with an intensification of 'noticing' what is going on in the everyday
world, followed by the practice of mental writing – eg creating haiku in the
mind and playing with the form and rhythm until it feels right, before finally
putting the haiku to pen and paper – writing and rewriting the haiku can feel
like, or act as, meditation.
Some qualities that may be found in haikus:
- Present moment magnified, hence
an immediacy of emotion
- Interpenetrating the source of
inspiration ie no space between observer and observed
- Simple, uncomplicated
language and images
- Appeal to intuition, not
intellect
- Human presence is fine if
presented as a harmonious part of nature ie human nature should blend in
with the rest of nature rather than dominate the forefront
- Though not frequently used, humour
is fine, if it fits the feel of the haiku
- Musical sensitivity to language
(effective use of rhythm and lyricism)
- Feeling of a particular place
within the cycle of seasons
- Open-endedness is a cherished
part of haiku-allowing the reader to decide
Some Modern Haikus
layoffs
the blow up santa
as buoyant as ever
LeRoy Gorman, 2009
she will need fresh fruit
but with our central
heating
it dies within days
Gary Studley, 2008
casualty lists –
smaller and smaller
print
Kristen Deming, 2007
there, his boots mildewed-
laces too hard for knuckles
wag redundant tongues
Frank
Johns, 2006
in
haste
a
slice of cheek
bleeding
Anon,
2005
………………………………………………………………………………………………………
And Finally: As well as the usual Wikipedia,
here are dozens of websites with definitions of haikus (both traditional and
modern) to refer to. www.modernhaiku.org;
www.toyomasu.com; www.poemofquotes.com; www.thegreenleaf.co.uk/basho; www.poemhunter.com etc, so enjoy the
search. Writing haikus can be both an exercise in discipline and minimalism,
and a liberating or spiritual experience, so if you haven’t written one before,
I hope you enjoy the experience.